You’d be surprised how often I hear about my team experiencing jealousy from their spouses. I really don’t think other professions really have to deal with this as much– after all, what spouse is jealous of a partner who goes to a bleak corporate office day after day? Not many!
But when your job is to lead wine tastings in the homes of cool people who love wine, cheese and good conversation, spouses often deal with envy; especially if they are staying home with the kids a couple nights a week.
Jealousy from spouses is a serious issue, especially when it starts to interfere with your ability to earn money and build a future for your family, but there are ways to deal with it productively.
Our Business is Driven by Fun but We Work Hard, Too
The truth is that WineShop at Home operates under a very social business model. Our revenue is driven by spending time with other people who have similar interests, and yeah, drinking with them! It naturally tends to be a whole lot of fun.
Of course, we take it seriously and we work hard, but at it’s core the business is about creating relationships and having fun with other people who also love delicious wine and great conversation.
We sell our wine in a social environment where people get to relax. Our team meetings are laid back and a total blast (name another industry where you’re actually encouraged to sip a beverage during conference calls?!).
And it’s only natural that when your spouse is babysitting the kids over the weekend while you’re having the time of your life at convention, the fun photos posted on Facebook just might make him or her feel jealous.
How to Handle the Jealousy
It breaks my heart when I see consultants pull back from the business or stop taking action because of a jealous spouse. And believe me, the jealousy is a very real thing: I’ve seen husbands refuse to watch the kids so the wife can lead a wine tasting in the evening, and I’ve seen spouses (consciously or otherwise) start arguments every time the partner has to walk out the door to go to a WineShop event.
I’m grateful that my husband takes my business seriously – he knows that this is a business. The purpose is to generate income for my family, and although I have fun and I love what I do, him being jealous of me for leading a wine tasting would be like me being jealous of him when he goes on a business trip!
I hate it when I see a consultant held back by his or her spouse. I wish the jealous spouse could see past the negative emotions and realize how beneficial the work is for everyone involved! Often, being a WineShop at Home consultant is about more than making money: in most cases, consultants quickly come to realize that not only are they bringing in revenue, they’re also building communication skills, stretching themselves and becoming better people.
So, what can you do if you notice that your spouse is feeling jealous? Here are a few tips that I’ve seen work in the past…
- Show them your results. Nothing helps a spouse have a change of heart like a nice big fat commission check! When the check arrives in the mail, show your spouse your progress and offer to use the cash in a way that benefits everyone. Maybe you pay the utilities this month, or you put the money in a savings account toward a fun family event or night out.
- Put emphasis on the work. When your spouse logs onto Facebook and sees the fun photos of you from a tasting, all he or she understands is how much fun you’re having. After all, doesn’t it look like one big WineShop party? Your spouse isn’t seeing all the work you’ve put in beforehand to get to this point! Now, I’m not saying that you need to be manipulative, but make sure that your partner sees the other side of the coin, too: talk to him or her about the struggles you have, about the hours you put in, about your goals. Recruit them to be on your side, and you’ll have a better chance of them rooting for you. I do have a word of caution on sharing the struggles, temper it a bit. Some spouses want to fix it for you and the easiest fix can be to say “just stop doing it”, that’s not the answer but I understand that they don’t want you unhappy. Quitting though, doesn’t fix the problem and had I QUIT, I wouldn’t be HERE!! So, if you miss a goal, have a bad tasting or are frustrated call your upline FIRST. I do. My business Coach Dana Phillips and WineShop at Home V.P. Joe Lobue are on speed dial for a reason!
- Give ‘em something special. We all got into this business because we LOVE wine, right? So when that case of earned wine arrives on your doorstep, make it special! Cook your spouse a nice dinner (or better yet, cook it together) and crack open that Magnificent 7. Make sure your significant other feels special, and show him or her that you both get to enjoy the benefits of your work as a WineShop consultant!
I hope these tips are helpful, because you totally deserve to have a thriving WineShop at Home business that benefits your ENTIRE family! If you’ve been considering joining WineShop at Home, let’s talk. Click HERE to speak with me one on one to get started.